Saturday, January 26, 2013

Long and lingering week

The plague has descended upon our house.  We're on day 7 of Caden having bronchiolitis and now Livy is sick, too.  It's so hard to watch the little guy be so sick.  We have two humidifiers running in his room round the clock, do nebulizers of albuterol and steamy showers, and lots of saline and nose cleaning...but he's still sick.  It's been a long week for us all.

With only about one week left until going back to work, I'm a bundle of different emotions.  Excitement for something familiar, yet fresh and new.  It will be nice to get out of the house on a regular basis and talk to adults.  (Talk to anyone, for that matter.  Caden is not a good conversationalist yet.)  But it also will be us marking a big change with our little ones in a new daycare.  And I'm in a bit of denial about the transition and have been putting off the things we need to do, like get labels for C's bottles, finish the 70 pages of enrollment documents, and actually read the parent handbook.  The reality is that I'm worried it will be an awful hot mess for Olivia and I dread seeing her disrupted and upset because we don't have unlimited cash for daycare.  But, we don't.  And that's life, I guess.  Sigh.

I'm tired.  Not in a way that a nap takes care of, more chronically tired.  Emotionally tired.  I've been away from Caden very, very little in the last 3 months.  I don't wish away any of that time together, but I do feel that we need to find a new balance as a family to make sure that everyone in the household is happy, including me.  The support we had hoped for from others simply never came, despite big talk.  So we have to adjust.  Have honest conversations.  Stick to our promises to each other.  It's tough.

For now, though, it's about getting through this plague of sick on our home without having to take C to the hospital or keep O home from school too much. I'm hoping that a good night sleep has brought a fresh perspective to all.  We are in desperate need of one.

1 comment:

  1. Hang in there, Spad. I found nothing as tiring as our kids when they were little, and none of them came with the additional health worries as does C. Kids are resilient, and after the transition into the new routine, everyone will settle down fine. I think some time at work will likely help you to feel more like yourself, too.