Something for me...

Tonight I'm doing something for me.  This is a big move on my part.  Aside from a pedicure here and there and an occasional solo trip to the grocery store, I don't do much for just me.  It's a bad combination of "total cheapskate" and "control freak who must be productive at all times."

I muscle through stuff usually and it's not always ever pretty.  It's also no fun for the hubby or strangers who come within 5 feet.

So, today I'm getting my old gym membership back.  I used to be a fitness nut.  Long-distance triathlons and some such.  Lots of miles logged on my bike and hours in the pool or on the road.  Fertility treatment always seems to bring this to a screeching halt and for both pregnancies I have struggled to get back onto track. Once Olivia was my #1 priority, fitness just became an aspirational run here and there.  Sad to my inner voice wondering where I got lost in the transaction, but a trade off I made with my eyes wide open.

But the problem is that I feel really, really lousy all the time right now.  My feet hurt constantly.  My calves are knotted up.  My pubis and my back holler at me throughout the day.  I rarely sleep well.  And I'm soft.  Not just prego soft, but out-of-shape-prego soft.  Why?  I don't move enough.  I can do more.

I resisted a lot to the idea because of the time commitment.  Seriously...if I could find an extra 90 minutes each day, wouldn't it be better to just sleep?? But Michael was insistent and I have given in. 

Last night I stopped at Modell's for a suit.  Attention pregnant ladies: Do NOT attempt to purchase a non-maternity suit when 7-months pregnant and wildly out of shape.  It is comical and frightening, all rolled into one ball of overstretched lycra straps and paunch.  Gross.

For now, I'm stuck with my flowery and super inappropriate beach suit, but it fits and is technically a bathing suit.  I get to pair this flowery number with a racing cap and goggles, cause that's how I roll.  Tonight that will be me...the beached whale in a flower skirted suit and a triathlon cap eaking out slow 50s in the lap pool.  Tickets start at $1.